Challenge and Change

True story. I need challenge to change. There's a sweet spot, not too much, not too little, but juuuuust right. The lady in the meme is doing Crow Pose -- a basic version. The full-on pose puts the knees in the armpits. But I like this one: this is the one that I regularly fall out of. However, I can tell that, by trying and trying again (and again), I'm ever so slowly getting closer.

Small progress is progress -- and it's encouraging. One of these days, I'm going to figure out this business of taking care of my body, and it's going to be awesome.

Bodies are cool.

Getting Out There

I'm starting to run again. It's nice to be back out there. I've basically lost all the ground I gained, as far as ability to run, in the year since I've last run. But I'm going to get it back. Today was the second run, actually. I went earlier in the week with Maulbeere. Next week I'm planning to go out 3 times, plus to a walk or yoga on the off days. I went about 1.5 miles; Runner's World has this awesome tool that will tell you how far you went. Runner's World also reminded me that the last time I tried running I managed to move 28 miles, all total. Which is a pretty good accomplishment. I'm looking to make that "total miles I've run" number get a lot bigger!

Trying to build momentum (again)

So, I went to the doctor yesterday (nothing serious.. mostly just a check-up) and, of course, they weigh you with their very accurate and unflinching scale (as opposed to mine at home which i KNOW is 10lbs light, but it's still nicer to see that number even knowing what it really means).

Ugh. I don't know how I can feel like I look better and see muscle definition in multiple places and still be gaining weight. Part of me argues that muscle weighs more than fat.. and I AM building muscle... However, I'm pretty sure that my tendency toward sugary snacks is not blameless either.

I actually received a terrible surprised earlier this week when I looked at the nutrition info on the yogurt covered raisins (the only way i like raisins) that have become a regular snack for me at work, and realized that there really isn't much nutritional value to them at all! No fiber, protein or calcium. Just carbohydrates. Now I have to find a new, healthier snack. Boo!

So, I was praying about getting some help to aid in my lack of willpower when it comes to food last night and I've decided to go back to Sparkpeople. I can get myself up every morning and do my workout (admittedly, sometimes more energetically than others) but I really struggle with the amount of food that I take in. I think that if I can revisit the idea of being aware of my caloric intake that I'd be less likely to indulge as frequently as I have been.

Back on the wagon with me.

Weigh-in

Not too bad. I always suffer when I don't drink water, and I had several days in a row, what with Independence Day and the Fast Sunday. I fluffed right up with bloating. But all but 1 pound of that is gone now. My measurements were a mixed bag: some loss, some gain. But I'm back on track and getting things going in the right direction. One thing that's helped is that when I write my measurements, I write down the new number, then in parenthesis I'll put the change for the week and the total change. That's pretty wordy. It's just this:

Weight: 203 (+1/-6)
Waist: 36 1/2" (-1/2" / -2 1/4")
Hips: 45 1/4" (+1" / -1 1/4")
R. Thigh: 26 1/4" (+1/4" / -1")

It's a bit of a mess to look at, and the math is sort of obnoxious. But I've decided that it's absolutely worth it: when I had the gains this week, I could see that there is still progress, even though it wasn't a stellar week. And it has helped keep my thoughts in the way they should be so that I'm still feeling successful, still feeling hopeful. And THAT means that I'm not feeling the urge to sabotage myself. It's worth a bit of messy math to me!

New motivation

Well, I AM still alive. So there's a Freshman Formal dance coming up at school, on the 28th of February I think. I convinced mom to buy me a dress, but I need to do sit ups ir something so I can get my belly to not bulge as much in the time I have. mom said that if I do between 10 and 25 sit ups every day, maybe twice a day, that I could get my stomach to noy bugle so much. :) YAY!! I'm trying that to see how well it going to work, so I'm going to go in my room and see how many sit ups I can do. A while ago, I went to my dear oldest sister's house, and she and her husband were trying to help get me a routine for excersising, and he said that I'm not really breathing when I excersise. I suppose that's not very good. He told me that I should count" 1,2" for every breath in, and every breath out. So far it's been working wonderfully. You should tell your husband thanks for me, dear oldest sister. :) I was also thinking that in addition to my sit ups, I would walk on that treadmill that's downstairs once a day, for about 20 - 30 minutes, and see how much I can do, and try to take less time getting that far so I can go farther in the same amount of time. :) WHEE! I haven't been doing very well with my dieting and whatnot, but someone at church today commented that I was looking skinnier! That made me feel SO good! That meant that the little things that I was doing were working! YES! I love all of you sisters and mother of mine!

Young Sister in Wisconsin :)

Handy Little Reminders

I finally got around to posting all the things I've been meaning to post inside my bathroom cabinet tonight :) Along with it, I made this sign. I thought it turned out pretty well, so I thought I'd share, on the off chance that anybody might wanted to print out a ready-made sign.

Back in the Saddle Again

Well, I'm getting back up and trying again. I rode the bike for a half hour this morning. I kept my breakfast light and my lunch reasonable. I'm drinking my water.

Fall down seven times, get up eight. -Japanese Proverb.

I think I may be past 7 falls already, but I'm still getting up, so there's still hope for me.

Checking In

I took my measurements today and in spite of some Halloween indulgence, I'm slightly down. The scale says I'm up, but with all the new exercise, I'm not too worried about that! I'm feeling pretty good. I didn't do perfectly last week; I missed 2 workouts and was usually short on water. But I'm making progress both in my measuring and in building habits, which in the long term is more important than any single day.

Over bust: 38 1/2 (-1/4)
Bust: 42 1/2 (-1/2)
Waist: 37 (-1/4)
Hips: 44 (-1/2)

Weight: 203 (+3)

Pushups: 27
Running: 1.05 miles in 22:55.


I've been thinking. It seems that for me loosing weight is as much of spirituality as it is about getting sweaty and eating right. The Lord has made it clear that I need to do a better job of taking care of my body, and because it's something that He's asked me to do, that means that He will help me get it done. Thing is, that means that working through the tough spots where it feels like Nothing is Happening is as much a matter of faith and patience as anything. It also means that when I fall down and don't do very well, repentance is available, and the Lord will help me get back on my feet.

Pondering

I said a while back that I was going to post a "before" picture. Here it is! It's one of the ones that Nicole took when we were out to the Great Salt Lake. That was lots of fun & we got some great pictures & I think this one does nicely as an honest before picture, without being completely awful. So there's that.

Our Relief Society is going to be doing a 5k. I'm pondering. I've thought about doing one of those things before. I think I even signed up to do this one, although then I went on 2 big trips and sorta fell off the wagon as far as training goes. But there's most of 2 months before the race, and I'm pondering. Two months sounds like it should be long enough to learn to run 5k. The big question is, am I motivated enough to actually go through with it? Running isn't typically my thing. I'm a bit nervous about this whole idea. But at the same time, what an accomplishment! I'd like to someday do a marathon. In order to get there I have to start with where I'm at...

Be Strong!!

To be honest, I've never really been very good at the whole sustained self motivation thing. Sure, I'll get excited about a project, but that excitement generally will wane and often, eventually fade and then what's left is one more thing on my list of "Phases".. heh. My life is peppered by the various different phases that I've gone through over the years: Trolls.. Tye Dye.. Animal Prints.. and that's just for starters. Not that it's a bad thing by any means, I think I've become a more well rounded person (at least more quirky for sure) because of it, and I like that about me. However, it does mean that I do struggle from time to time with continuing with this whole workout regime.
Not that I ever forget that I'd like to loose x amount of pounds before November 6th, just that sometimes that motivation seems less pressing than my desire to order a pepperoni pizza for dinner (for just myself) on a quiet Friday night after a long week.

However, there are precautions that I've put in place to avoid such pitfalls as that. In addition to this blog, I have a sort of network of people that I randomly tell things to, when I need it. For example, at a church activity recently, they were serving tasty tasty brownies as refreshments. (big ones. without frosting... mmmmmmmmm) However, I'd already been very bad with my eating that day and I knew I ought not indulge in yet another unhealthy food. So, I turned to this nice boy who was there, a friend of mine, and said "Chris, I'm saying this out loud so that someone else can hear it: I am NOT going to eat a brownie." He laughed and said "Ok, you can't eat one if I don't eat one." Which worked out nicely because he can't eat chocolate in any form.

Then, just yesterday, I was standing on the platform waiting for my train on the way home from work and I was struck by this HUGE desire to eat some pepperoni pizza. I found myself justifying why it would be ok, even though it would be just for myself (Little Caesar's pizza is just $5.. that wouldn't even blow my budget!) even though, left to my own you KNOW I would eat the entire thing in two (maybe three) sittings. So, I sent a text message to my old college buddy that said "Karina, tell me not to order a pizza for dinner tonight". She responded beautifully "Two words.... Wedding Dress." Hahaha.. well said.

And I was good. Though, clearly I was having cravings. So, recognizing this as truth (and knowing it to be a recurring thing) Rather than suppress it and deny myself completely of all that is tasty and risk binging later, I decided to splurge. Splurge, yes.. Binge, no. Instead of a tasty pizza, I bought a little bag with four brownie bites for dessert to my healthy dinner.. brownies, yes.. but only four. I figured that was infinitely better than eating half of a pizza.. heh. And I enjoyed every one :)
Whew.. made it through another test.. Now to continue onward! Be strong!

Oh, also while I was feeling all less than motivated, I remembered that my little workout regime said that this week I was supposed to write myself a little note congratulating myself. So, I did that last night as well and attached it to my mirror. Surprisingly, it helped!